Testimony

I know some of you have already read this, since I have posted it elsewhere and on my previous blog, but I felt led to post it again on this blog. This was in the year 2006.

For some time I had been struggling as a Christian. My relationship with God was not very intimate and I did not often pray very earnestly unless I wanted something. I would ask God to forgive me for my sins, but did not make much of an effort to not sin again. I behaved as if I could do whatever I wanted as long as I asked God to forgive me later. This is not exactly what I thought, but that is how I acted.

I believe I was a Christian. I did occasionally have some very earnest prayers, but I was a very corrupt and ungodly Christian. I also know I had a not so good affect on my three younger sisters. Without realizing it, they were getting bad habits from watching me. I thought that they should be able to take care of their own actions. I did not realize what an unbounded influence and great responsibility an older sibling has towards its younger siblings. I did not really care either.

As time went on, I kept living in this manner. I had serious thoughts now and then and even resolved to change my behavior at times. It would last a very short while, and then I would go back to the old way of living. I was quite unhappy. I could not feel at peace.

In May of this year, we started attending a new church. The first sermon seemed to speak to me. The Pastor spoke of having “form” in the Christian life, but having no “substance” with it. Without the “substance”, the form is no good. He gave an illustration of a coffee can made into a candle holder. You could punch a beautiful design on the outside of it and that would be the “form”. However, unless you put a lit candle inside of it (the “substance”) the “form” wouldn’t do any one any good.

I began to question how much “substance” I had. After the second sermon I heard, in which he spoke some more about “form” and “substance” along with other things, I began to realize how wayward I had become. I did not even have much “form” to speak of, much less any substance. I began to really pray that God would help me. I began to pay more attention to what God says in the Bible, but still I did not change very much.

One day I was feeling very miserable about my life. I was not sure what to do so I just cried out to God to help me. I reached for my Bible, which was near by and began to flip through it. My hand felt as though it was guided by some strange power and my eyes guided by the same. Each verse I read was for me. A few in particular I felt so much that I marked them in my Bible, a thing I rarely do.

Since that time, I have felt nearer to God. He is my Father and my very best Friend. I can tell Him everything. I can talk to Him at all times, about any and everything. I have a joy and peace that was never mine before in my memory.

It is for God’s glory that I write this. May He be glorified in this writing. Praise His holy name!

To the KING be all the glory!