I was just playing around the other day and these two characters popped their way into my head. I’m not sure what I’m going to do with them at this point – Keep them or toss them. Anyone think either of them sound like they would make a good storyline and that I should try to continue?
Eloise
Eloise crouched beneath the blankets trying to appear invisible. Her sodden pillow felt cool against her burning cheek. The moon peeked into the room through the burgundy curtains, outlining the maple tree outside. The heavy tread of footsteps stopped before her door, then faded away into the deafening silence of night. She rolled over, pushing back the covers and breathing heavily. She suddenly felt hot and stifled. What, oh what, was she going to do?
Andrew
Running harder than ever before in his twenty-one years, Andrew bolted around the corner of a dilapidated barn, nearly colliding with a propped up pitchfork. Heart pounding against his chest, his throat was parched for lack of water. His eyes stung and his breath came like the repeated shots of a gun. Suddenly the sole of his foot made contact with a patch of mud, while his eyes had been focused over his shoulder and he fell down flat. For a moment he lay perfectly still, until the shouts of men and the howls of dogs reached his ears. He pushed himself up and tried to press on. He had to make it…
To the KING be all the glory!
Oh, most definitely keep them. Even if personalities don’t emerge, the scenes might prompt something somewhere. I think both together would be an intriguing story… where will it go?
Well done.
Hmm, interesting… they sound like they belong in the same story, maybe a WWII type story–that’s how it came off to me, anyway. . .
~Jamie Joyce
Andrew sounds like a keeper to me! Sounds kinda like a exciting Nazi chasing Jews plot or something!
Eloise kinda sounds like… (forgive me-) Claudius. My personal thoughts are to toss her out. Maybe if she wasn’t in bed it would sound a little more excited to me.
Just my thoughts. :)
^ That is, if she is in bed…
Yes! Combine them into one story. I think Eloise should be hearing Andrew’s footsteps…
Wow! Thank you everyone! I’m now mentally pursuing the idea of putting Andrew and Eloise in one of my books. I’ll try to post about any progress I have. :)
Oh and Kayla… don’t worry. She won’t be like Claudius… :p
To the KING be all the glory!
Rebekah
That’s good to hear! lol