Those of you who have seen the film “Wives and Daughters” know from whence I have taken this quote. In this scene (from one of BBC’s most brilliant as well as most lengthy productions) a woman made a suggestion that affected the whereabouts of the heroine, who was present. The heroine, Molly, immediately answers with a rude and passionate manner. To do her credit, Molly immediately apologized and changed her tone as well as words but it is the reply of the woman that I want to draw attention to. Addressing herself to the future step-mother of Molly, the woman says with a smile, “She’s knows her own mind, Claire!”

This phrase is not limited to “Wives and Daughters” alone. I have noticed it more and more in movies, nearly always in connection with a young woman, usually between the ages of about fifteen to twenty-five. Someone, almost always an elder of the girl and in a position of authority over her, will suggest or even command her to do or not do something or perhaps even just contemplate it. The girl will respond in a manner both rude and arrogant that she knows better and will not follow what they have said. Her reasons, when given, are nearly always based upon self and what she wants. Unlike Molly, the girl rarely apologizes for her behavior but pushes it to its fullest extent, to the point of secretly doing that which she was forbidden to do. We see this all the time when it comes to forbidden marriages in movies, where the couple manages to marry, despite the hot protest from (usually the young woman’s) parents – most often Father. Or, the girl who wants an education or a job outside of the home but the father and/or mother forbids it, yet the girl refuses to submit, stubbornly asserts what she wants and in the end, generally, succeeds.

Our young women are being shaped more and more by this girl who “knows her own mind”. She knows her own mind alright! She knows exactly what she wants and often doesn’t care a bit what the reasons may be behind the protests of her elders. She believes she knows better than her elders and does not heed them. What is worse, in these movies, the young woman is nearly always proven right and her parents/elders wrong. But it doesn’t always (and probably not even usually) turn out that way.

I’m not saying that everything that our parents or our elders might say is correct nor am I saying that every time that we believe or think something opposite of them, that we’re wrong. We’re all human and as capable of error as the next one, whatever our age but our parents and those in similarly placed authority, have much more experience than we do! In addition to that, they are older and (at least usually) much more mature than we are.

“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” (Exodus 20:12) If we are honoring our father and mother, will we speak to them in a rude and arrogant manner? Will we cast off their suggestions and advice as worthless without even a second thought, if we are truly honoring them?

“Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.” (Hebrews 13:17) This verse is so clear… It doesn’t say to obey and submit if you like what they want or if you feel like it, it says to obey and submit. If those in authority were asking you to sin, it would be a different matter, as that would be contrary to the rest of Scripture, but if we are merely rebelling since we don’t want or like what we are being told, then we are going against scripture and are therefore sinning ourselves.

“Knowing your own mind” at a very young age, in the sense that you are a mature individual is a very good thing – but one sign of maturity will be that you follow the Scriptures and listen to those in authority, not assuming that you know better than they do. I know that I struggle with this – it’s so easy to assume that I know so much! It’s so easy to just brush aside the advice of my parents and elders, simply because I don’t want to hear it! As followers of Christ, it is our responsibility and our duty to defeat this tendency, to follow the voice of the Scriptures, ignore the voice of the world and listen, actually listen to our parents and elders and see what they might have to say. We might be surprised at how much wisdom they have to offer.

To the KING be all the glory!

About a year and a half ago, I started a series on essays on the tongue. I wrote two parts and then – well – stopped. I wanted to start them up again, so I thought that this week, I would post the first two essays again, and then continue on from there. So, without further ado …

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“If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is worthless.” James 1:26

The lying and deceitful tongue: it can seem so innocent, so harmless, so convenient… “No one will ever know or care anyway,” we reason to ourselves. So we lie – just a “little lie” and we go on. Often we may need to lie again just to cover up the first falsehood, then again… and again. “I am not hurting anyone,” we think – but do we ever ask ourselves, “What does the Bible say about lying?”

The LORD makes it clear in HIS Word that HE hates lying and even “just” deceiving. The book of Psalms often makes references to the “lying tongue” or the “deceitful mouth” and each time these references infer the evilness thereof. In Psalm 52:3 it says in reproof to a “mighty man”, “You love evil more than good, falsehood more than speaking what is right.” In Psalm 59:12 it says: “On account of the sin in their mouth and the words of their lips, let them even be caught in their pride, and on account of curses and lies which they utter.”

The LORD commanded the Israelites in Leviticus 19:11, “You shall not steal, or deal falsely, nor lie to one another.” In this instance, lying is placed on the same level as stealing. In Proverbs we read, “What is desirable in a man is his kindness and it is better to be a poor man than a liar.” (Proverbs 19:22) Also, “Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who deal faithfully are His delight.” (Proverbs 12:22)

In Proverbs 24:28 we are instructed, “Do not be a witness against your neighbor without cause, and do not deceive with your lips.” “Deceit is in the heart of those who devise evil, but counselors of peace have joy.” (Proverbs 12:20) “Simply deceiving” is just as wicked as outright lying and often there is no difference.

So, what exactly is the definition of a lie, you may ask? In Noah Webster’s American Dictionary of the English Language, a “lie” is defined as follows: “A criminal falsehood; a falsehood uttered for the purpose of deception; an intentional violation of truth.” and “To utter falsehood with an intention to deceive, or with an immoral design.” Deceit is defined as follows: “Literally, a catching or ensnaring. Hence, the misleading of a person; the leading of another person to believe what is false, or not to believe what is true, and thus to ensnare him; fraud; fallacy; cheat; any declaration, artifice or practice, which misleads another, or causes him to believe what is false.”

The Old Testament is not the only place that the Bible discusses lying and deceit either. In Romans 1, Paul is giving a list of the wickedness of men and in verse 29 we read, “being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice; they are gossips,” In Colossians 1:9-11, we are given a direct command as Christians: “Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created him – a renewal in which there is no distinction between Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave and freeman, but Christ is all, and in all.” Also, in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 25 we read: “Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.” In Mark 7:21-23 we read “For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries, deeds of coveting and wickedness as well as deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. All these evil things proceed from within and defile the man.”

In Revelation 22 we find out the final consequences of lying: “Blessed are those who wash their robes, so that they may have the right to the tree of life, and may enter by the gates into the city. Outside are the dogs and the sorcerers and the immoral persons and the murderers and the idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices lying.” (Revelation 22:14-15)

From a Biblical perspective, lies and deceit are not pleasing to the LORD. Let us therefore pray as the psalmist did: “Deliver my soul, O LORD, from lying lips, from a deceitful tongue.” (Psalm 120:2)

To the KING be all the glory!

A few thoughts that have been working around in my brain lately …

I recently finished reading “John Adams” by David McCullough. (Review will hopefully follow shortly.) While reading, I received an in depth view of our founding fathers that I never had before. Mainly based on letters written by the people themselves, “John Adams” let me see the personalities, beliefs and characters of several men and woman who were instrumental in forming our country. There are so many lessons that we can learn from the lives of these people that I am amazed!

From the time of his marriage (if not before) Mr. Adams spent much of his time away from home. As a lawyer, he had to “go on the circuit” and consequently spent much of his time in Boston each year while his wife lived in his hometown of Braintree. When trouble broke out with Britain, he was elected as a representative of Massachusetts in Congress. He was one of the most respected members and most persuasive speakers in Congress but as a result, he spent most of the year in Philadelphia, while his wife stayed home with their four young children. When Congress decided to send three ambassadors to France, John Adams was one. Shortly after his return, he was again sent to France and then England. His time spent in Europe covered several years. John Adams was always ready to sacrifice himself for the good of his country. He loved his wife, children and farm dearly, but he often left them in view of the public good. He believed he was doing that which was right. He was a dutiful man and a sincere Christian. But one thing that we can perhaps learn from him is the influence of a father’s presence among his children, particularly his sons.

From the time that his children were very young, Mr. Adams was seldom able to be around. He constantly wrote to his family and especially to his eldest son, John Quincy. Through correspondence, he instructed the lad in much of his learning, telling him what books to study, etc… that would be beneficial to his education. When Mr. Adams took his first trip to France, John Quincy went with him. His daughter and two younger sons Charles and Thomas stayed at home with their mother. Though placed in a boarding school, John Quincy was constantly with his father, taking walks with him and talking to him. Due to the difficulty of correspondence across the ocean, the younger boys rarely even heard from their father. When Mr. Adams returned to America, it had been over a year (perhaps two). After a very short stay, he again left for France, this time taking with him John Quincy and Charles. After a time, Charles was sent home, while John Quincy remained across the ocean and though not always with his father, spending much of his time with him, being taught by him or corresponding with him. When Mrs. Adams finally joined her husband in France, only their daughter Nabby joined her, the two boys remaining in America to prepare for college. By the time Mr. Adams returned to America, his two younger boys were both in college and nearly adults.

In the years that followed, John Quincy proved to be a comfort to his parents and to follow in his father’s morals and footsteps. He was a dutiful, honest, Christian man, always honoring his parents whom he dearly loved.

Charles, ruined his own life, abandoned his wife and two daughters and ended up dying of illness at a young age.

Thomas, did not turn out to much, became the “bully of the family” and took to drinking heavily.

I have also been reading First and Second Samuel. King David was a very righteous man – a man after God’s own heart. While reading, I have been reflecting on the character of David, even more than I have previously. From a very young age, David was much away from home, fighting the Philistines and other enemies of Israel. Even before he killed Goliath, he was King Saul’s armor bearer. After he became King, his time was inevitably spent in passing judgments and he still went out to fight many battles and wars. He had several wives and by these, many children. As a result of David’s constant duties and many children, he most likely had little time to spend with his sons, except for perhaps Solomon, whom he knew was to be the next king.

Amnon, sinned against his sister and was then murdered for it.

Absalom, murdered his brother Amnon, “stole the hearts” of the people of Israel and then tried to steal the kingdom from his father and murder him.

Adonijah tried to steal the kingdom from his brother and was later executed for other crimes.

Solomon became a wise king and ruler, though he later bowed to false gods and tried to murder another man. (Though I believe that he did repent.)

Looking at the lives of these two godly men, whom I admire, I mourn to see the destruction in their sons. In his old age, reflecting upon his children, John Adams wrote: “Children must not be wholly forgotten in the midst of public duties.” There seems to be a pattern … perhaps this is an illustration showing how important it is, for a father to spend time with his sons … I don’t know. I have yet to find the answer but I find it heartbreaking that these godly men, should not have godly sons to follow in their footsteps. I pray that my brother, and one day (LORD willing) my sons will follow in the footsteps of godly fathers and that through them, the light of Christ might be shown to this world and glory be brought to our blessed King!

To the KING be all the glory!

There are many things that we can learn from studying history and history’s figures. By studying the men and women of the past, we can see examples both of good and of evil. We can learn from the mistakes of others and do our best to avoid them. We can recognize righteous deeds and try to emulate them. Ultimately, we should base our conduct on the Bible but viewing history in light of the Scriptures, can serve to illustrate that which the LORD has laid forth. Many historical figures are great examples of various verses in Proverbs – both positive and negative. One of these figures is John Adams.

John Adams was born in the year 1735. His ancestors had emigrated from England to the United States in 1638. He was born in the same little town in which his great-great-grandparents had settled – Braintree, Massachusetts. As a young man, Mr. Adams studied hard and obtained the position of a respected lawyer. When he was in his late twenties, he married his wife Abigail. Together they had five children, one who died in infancy.

Mr. Adams was a remarkable man who was not afraid to stand up for what he believed to be right. As a respected member of Congress, he was highly influential and the LORD used him greatly to help bring about the War of Independence. Even when his closest friends were opposed to him, Mr. Adams knew that the time to separate from Great Britain had come and he boldly brought forth his arguments to a hesitant Congress. Though the approval of man was sweet to him, Mr. Adams did not allow that to prevent him from doing that which he believed to be right. He continued undaunted and courageous through the strongest opposition – he was not a man to give up easily. “A man will be satisfied with the good fruit of his words, and the deeds of a man’s hands will return to him.” (Proverbs 12:14) Surely, Mr. Adams had cause to be “satisfied with the good fruit of his words”! After all of his endeavors, Congress finally did vote in favor of Independence.

As remarkable as John Adams was, like the rest of us, he still had his faults. Proverbs 12:28, “There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of the sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Mr. Adams was known for talking a lot – he was well read and could converse intelligently on a variety of topics. He was also an active correspondent with a number of people, including his wife, from whom he was often absent during the war. After a disagreement with a fellow delegate in Congress, Mr. Adams was quite vexed. He managed to stay calm in his conversation with the man but later, in a private letter to another person, Mr. Adams wrote more than perhaps he meant. In sharp terms, he put forth his displeasure and vexation. The letter did not reach the intended recipient. The British intercepted it and soon published it in all the Tory newspapers – his private letter was now open to the public. Mr. Adams reaped the fruit of his words – his fellow delegate was angered and hurt. He refused to even speak to Mr. Adams. Many others, who respected the offended man, shunned Mr. Adams.

Many of the founding fathers of the United States, like Mr. Adams were quite remarkable men. We can learn a lot from them but they like the rest of us were only human. They made many mistakes and not everything they did was completely in line with the Scriptures. While studying these men, I hope that we will learn from them but always match there words and actions with the highest authority – the Word of God!

To the KING be all the glory!